Anxiety

Thoughts creep in, and everything changes.

Suddenly, calm, peace, and joy are replaced by dread, worry, and negativity.

The thoughts are inconvenient.

The emotions are uncomfortable.

The sensations in your body are unpleasant.

You look for a way out… but what can you do?

No matter how hard you try…

When those thoughts and feelings overpower you, it’s natural to try to eliminate them.

You might try “positive thinking.” You hear a lot about that in our society – you know… “cancel out” the negative with the positive.

Have you ever tried it?

It’s impossible. The harder you try to eliminate the worry, the tighter it chokes you. Your mental efforts to quell your anxiety usually make you feel MORE anxious and depressed.

You probably know how it feels to get caught up in time-consuming dialogue with another part of your mind!

Some things will always be out of your control.

That’s why you shouldn’t focus on eliminating anxiety from your life. You’ll never eradicate the possibility of those thoughts, feelings, and memories from your mind.

You can’t NOT think about a pink elephant if somebody keeps asking you NOT to think about a pink elephant. It’s exceedingly difficult to control what thoughts pop into your head and what associated feelings come with them.

What you CAN control is what you are going to do next.

Are you going to “numb” yourself with substances, drinking, sleeping, overeating, or other avoidant behaviors?

Are you going to procrastinate on doing the important things you know you need to get done?

Will you continue to repress or ignore your anxiety?

Therapy can help you do what you’re SUPPOSED to do…

You might have this question about what happens in my therapy room.

Often in life, we forget to be patient. We tend to rush through everything while carrying a mind full of noise run by random thoughts.

One of the steps in managing anxiety is understanding our minds and then trying to tame them when it becomes chaotic.

Practicing mindfulness, we observe our thoughts and understand the connection between thoughts and emotions. Understanding and familiarizing ourselves with emotions means we no longer run away from them.

When anxiety comes because of worrying thoughts that pop up out of nowhere, we can learn to take a step back and observe the thoughts and emotions. This allows us to avoid making impulsive decisions just to eliminate bothersome thoughts or emotions.

As we learn to create some distance between our thoughts and sense of being, which is just an observer, we can go through life behaving true to what’s important to us without being side-tracked by uncomfortable emotions.

In therapy, we learn to look at our emotions and embrace each to raise our pain tolerance. The endpoint is not that we want to become better at tolerating pain.

The point is to learn about the pain, so we don’t turn it into suffering.

And if we have already done so to convert it back to just standard pain, the most common currency is on the other side of love.

As humans, it is impossible to love without experiencing pain because of it. But if we are so afraid of pain to the point of not accepting it, we can still live, but our lives become so small that there is no space for important things. In other words, life loses its meaning.

A big part of therapy that is even more critical than managing anxiety is exploring and understanding our purpose in life. Once we know what brings us fulfillment, we can start taking steps in a committed and disciplined way toward them.

Therapy can also be a great place to help implement practical and long-lasting habits in commitment to reaching our goals. The therapist can be a compassionate point person to keep us on track and accountable. A lot of times, accountability can guarantee success.

Make a change and start living a life that is filled with peace.

Anxiety should not make the calls in your life, but your true self should.

Don’t let your anxiety run your life, so you get to the end of it filled with regrets.

Call today to explore why it is time for you to commit to something that can change your life for the better: (510) 605-0688.

If you still have more questions, I provide consultation free of charge for 15 minutes to review any clarifications. It is important to note that it is very difficult to get any results out of therapy until you are willing to give therapy a chance and commit to at least four sessions. Please ask about accommodations for committing to four sessions only for new clients.

I look forward to meeting you face-to-face.